Tilli’s Second Chance – Chapter 4

The Interstellar Agency looms above me, a stunning masterpiece of architecture that marries traditional Japanese design with futuristic elements. Sunlight filters through the open-air building and casts dappled shadows on the polished floors below. Okay, here we go. I lift my head and shoulders as I make it past the front doors, excitement and nerves battling for dominance within me. Ivan trots by my side, his whiskers twitching.

“Ready, Tilli?”

“Of course,” I reply. I clear my throat to hide the tremble in my voice. I refuse to let my insecurities dampen this moment. This is the culmination of years of hard work and dedication to studying spaceship design. I need to remember that I’m qualified for this.

I am qualified. I am ready.

I hope I’m right.

I smile at the person who scans my badge and hand.

“You’re in meeting room 3B. It’s down the hall and to the left,” she says, pointing behind her. “We’ve sent the location and map to your tablet.”

“Thanks.” I glance at my tablet and the map pops up on the screen. I’ve been to several offices and rooms in the I.A. but not everywhere. I’m getting closer to having access to the entire building, and I cannot wait.

As we walk towards the meeting room, I run through everything I’ve been studying in my head. Not like it’ll matter. No one is going to quiz me as I walk through the door.

It’s mostly an old habit now.

Oh. There’s already a crowd outside of the conference room. Wow. There are a lot of suits crammed into the small hallway, all talking over each other. My hands begin to sweat. I’ve never seen so many top-tier scientists and engineers gathered together in one place. I scan the people waiting, searching for familiar faces among the sea of strangers. Not that I want to see anyone in particular or anything. Many people my age who work here will remember what happened… and I’m trying to forget it.

Trying and failing.

Ivan nudges me forward, sensing my hesitation. He takes a few steps ahead of me and weaves his way through the crowd, effortlessly dodging moving shoes and other animals. I follow him, grateful for him and confident he won’t lead me astray.

Oh shit. 

Oh no.

The crowd parts and there he is — Kaito Nakamura, one of my former schoolmates.

A flutter of attraction stirs within me. His tall, lean frame towers over the crowd, and his black hair is tousled, framing his angular face. His eyes sparkle when they meet mine, and my heart rate quickens as our gaze lingers for a moment. A tingle of anticipation runs through me as I take in the sight of him after all these years. 

Did I have a crush on him at some point? Yes, I probably did. I’ve had hundreds of crushes throughout my life, several recently.

But him? I remember him.

Anyway, it doesn’t matter. I quickly shake it off. 

I’m here for business, not a trip down memory lane.

His eyes slide away, and my stomach drops. That twinkle in his eye was probably imagined. I doubt he even remembers who I am… 

He must. I remember him being there when I was accused of cheating. 

Still, even if he does remember me, I’m probably just that girl who sat next to him in physics class and got all the answers right.

That’s right. I was the know-it-all before I was the cheater.

“Tilli, don’t let your nerves get to you,” Ivan whispers, returning to my feet. “You’re here for a reason, and you’ve worked hard to get where you are. Remember, focus on the task at hand.” Ivan’s golden eyes narrow as he watches Kaito from afar. “There’ll be time for distractions later.”

“Right.” I force my gaze away from Kaito to the meeting room.

I slip through the crowd, aware that some people are moving on and not staying in this room. This appears to be a transition time between the previous meeting and my upcoming one. Several people push past me, their paired animals at their feet. Someone’s fox brushes against my leg, so I move to the side…

And step straight into Kaito.

“Oh shit.” 

He’s tipping to the side. I snap my hand out and grab his shirt to prevent him from falling over. He overcorrects and slams straight into me, knocking my bag to the floor.

For a moment, we’re pressed up against each other, and the heat from his body seeps into mine. I’m transfixed by the way his eyes seem to darken as he stares down at me, and I lean in closer to him.

“Tilli.” Ivan’s voice breaks through the haze of desire that’s clouding my mind. “What are you doing?”

Snap out of it, Tilli.

I pull away from Kaito and an embarrassed blush floods my chest. “Sorry,” I mumble, bending down to retrieve my bag. “I got jostled in the crowd.”

“It’s fine,” Kaito says. “No harm done.”

Gathering my courage, I throw everything into my bag and stand up. “Hey, um, I don’t know if you remember me, but we were in the Academy together. Tilli Kimura.” I offer a smile and bow before looking into his eyes.

He returns the smile for a moment before looking away. “Oh, yeah, I remember you.”

The moment turns frosty, and a chill climbs up my back. Great. I might just be imagining it, though. There was a smile for a hot second.

“It’s been ages since we last saw each other. How have you been?” I press on.

Kaito’s eyes flicker towards me, and I can tell that his smile is forced, a little pained. His lips barely move as he says, “Fine.”

His curt, one-word response tells me what I need to know. My past has come to bite me in the ass. But I’m not a bitch, and I refuse to start being one now. “I’d heard you joined the Interstellar Agency. That’s so great. Congratulations.”

Even I know when I’m being brushed off, but it’s better to be polite.

“Thanks,” he replies, and he seems to relax a little. He shifts on his feet, back and forth. With his shoulders up around his ears, he looks uncomfortable, not angry or annoyed.

Maybe he doesn’t want to be seen talking to me?

As disappointment gnaws at my confidence, a warm nuzzle against my hand knocks me out of my head. Looking down, a beautiful Akita, his brown eyes filled with curiosity and concern, looks back up at me.

“Who’s this?” I coo as I reach out to pet him.

“Ah, this is Max,” Kaito says, his voice softening. This is more like the Kaito I remember. “He’s my pair.”

“Hello, Max.” I scratch behind his ears. The dog’s gentle presence provides a brief moment of ease, diffusing some of the tension out of this ridiculous moment.

“Sorry to run, but we have to go,” Kaito says, and Max turns his head to woof at him. I don’t understand what Max is saying since only a pair can hear the voice of their animal, but whatever it is causes Kaito to shift back and forth again.

My face flushes with embarrassment as I nod. “Well, um, I think my meeting is starting. It was good seeing you.”

Suddenly, I have to use the bathroom.

Kaito’s eyes widen. He jerks his thumb over his shoulder. “You’re going in here?”

“Uh, yeah,” I say, backing away. “After I visit the restroom. Great seeing you again!”

I make a hasty retreat as quickly as I can without looking like I’m running. The air in the hallway is suddenly too stifling, and I can’t breathe. I turn down an adjacent corridor and race into a deserted bathroom. Ivan follows closely behind. I fly into the bathroom and check the stalls. Empty.

“I can’t do this.” I grip the edge of the pristine marble sink, and my knuckles turn white. “I can’t face them, not after that.”

“Tilli? Calm down. You look like you’re going to puke. You know I hate puking.” Ivan jumps onto the countertop beside me. His eyes fill with concern despite his grumpy demeanor.

“If Kaito is that distant, then there are bound to be more people in there who will be worse. And they all probably think I’m a cheater.” I bite my lip and fight back stupid, traitorous tears.

“It’s okay!” Ivan nudges me with his head. “You’re going to be all right.”

“No. I’m going to fail,” I insist.

“Oh, please,” he says, sitting on the edge of the sink. “Tilli Kimura never gives up this easily.”

“I’ve failed at everything else!” I sweep my hand out, indicating all of my past business ventures that have tanked and left me penniless and living at home with my parents at the ripe old age of twenty-six.

At this point in my life, I should have my shit together — a respectable career that pays outrageously well, a swanky downtown loft, and a thriving social calendar filled with brunch dates and boozy benders that end in a stranger’s bed. Isn’t that what every self-possessed woman in her twenties aspires to these days? 

I am not doing any of these things.

You’re a failure, Tilli.

Where did I go wrong? I’ve done nothing but study for the last two years while hoping to get this job. Should I have been out collecting one-night stands and hangovers like some kind of achiever badge on my express journey to find myself? Goodness knows I haven’t been to a bar or night club in years, and dinner out with my siblings doesn’t count.

I am not cut out for this, this social aspect of life.

“You are not a failure. You just haven’t found your place yet.” Ivan’s voice is firm but supportive, urging me to get a grip on my emotions and face my fears. “And your place is here. I can feel it.”

“Really?” I can’t believe I’m relying on my cat to tell me this, but I need to hear it from someone.

“For certain. And if you don’t get this job, you’ll find something else. Maybe something in fishery and wildlife?” He licks his lips.

I burst out into a laugh, and all of my tension goes right out the window with it.

“Wouldn’t you like that?” I sigh. “Right, you’re right.” I take a shaky breath. “I’ve come this far, and I can’t back down now.”

“I’m glad you agree because I’m always right.” He jumps down from the sink and rubs against my leg in a rare display of affection.

Okay. I can do this. 

I will not let my old reputation get in the way of achieving my dream job. I’m going to go in there, and I’m going to win this competition.

I’ve got this.

I look at my reflection in the mirror and try not to hate it. My hair is too long because I keep forgetting to make an appointment to get it cut. All of my makeup is five years out of date, and I haven’t plucked my eyebrows in forever. But I can’t do anything about that now. I smooth out my shirt, wash my hands, and grab my bag. 

My appearance doesn’t matter. Only the competition matters.

“Okay, Ivan, let’s do this.”

Stepping out of the bathroom, I hold myself upright and stride forward with purpose. Even if no one wants to talk to me, I know I have something valuable to contribute.

The moment I cross the threshold into the meeting room, though, Riku Saito’s icy gaze pins me in place. Oh, for the love of all things holy. Riku Saito is here? Why?

My stomach hollows out as I try to ignore his hostility and find a vacant seat. The cold metal of a chair presses against the back of my legs, and I lower myself into it. Of all the people to be stuck in a room with…

“Ah, Miss Kimura,” Riku drawls. “I see you’ve come to dazzle us with more of your family’s so-called ‘helpfulness and charity.’”

The words sting, but I refuse to let him see how much they affect me. I force a tight-lipped smile. “Well, at least we’re known for our philanthropy, unlike some people.”

“Don’t let him bait you.” Ivan’s fur bristles as he glares defiantly at Riku. Ivan wasn’t around when my family first dealt with Riku, but he’s heard of this awful man before.

“Perhaps,” Riku concedes. His tone drips with disdain. “But there’s a fine line between helping people and fraud, isn’t there?”

My cheeks burn as I clench my fists under the table. I know that nothing I say will change his mind or make him treat me with any respect.

He’s hated me since I was in third grade. And he was the first to laugh in my face when I was expelled from school. Of course, he graduated to the Agency with no issues. I guess he chose spaceship design as his specialty, right? Otherwise, he wouldn’t be here.

“I’m here to work.” I will my voice to remain steady despite the storm of emotions swirling in my chest. “Not talk to you.”

He leans back in his chair and crosses his arms over his chest. “Fine by me. I want nothing to do with you.”

“Keep breathing,” Ivan whispers. “You deserve to be here. You’ve worked hard, and you have something valuable to contribute.” He jumps down from the desk and approaches a bookshelf on the far side of the room. Leaping to a high shelf, he curls up in a ball and tucks his head in for a nap.

I want to come back in my next life as a cat.

The door slides open, and Kaito strides in, Max padding alongside him. I hold my breath at the sight of him, but the feeling is short-lived as he scans the room and selects a seat on the opposite side from where I’m sitting. Awesome. Everything is starting off just grand.

“All right. Let’s get started,” announces the meeting facilitator, tapping her tablet to bring up the agenda. “First up, Professor Nishimura will do an overview of the competition, what’s expected of you, how long you’ll have to complete the projects, and who you’ll be teamed with from the I.A. to get your work done.”

Teams? Oh no.

No one is going to want to work with me.

I want to cry. But there’s no turning back now. I have to see this through.

There’s nowhere else to go.

It’s either this or nothing.