Released – Chapter 30

Jiro and I break off from Sakai and Lucy, and he takes me around to all the areas of the casino. I’m careful to watch each area I’m introduced to so I can get an idea for what’s most profitable, but on a night like tonight, when it seems everyone is out gambling, it’s hard to tell. As I suspected, I’m not at all interested in getting involved myself though I have plenty of money to gamble with. Then we happen upon Miko playing roulette, and I’m sucked in. Badly. I thought I might like card games that rely on skill, but no, games of chance are more my speed.

We play for an hour straight with Jiro, Yoichi, and Usagi standing behind us. Yoichi and I still haven’t spoken, but I’m sure to turn and smile at him, letting him know that I’m not mad anymore.

When our time is up, we leave the roulette table reluctantly, pick up Kentaro playing craps, Beni playing slots, Mariko, Lucy, and Sakai all having drinks at the bar, and head to the restaurant for dinner. Waitstaff are already serving salads and glasses of wine. Oyama hand-delivers my food and sits at the other end of the table from me so he can watch anyone who approaches. I skip dessert but steal chocolate cake off of Jiro’s plate.

“Turnabout is fair play.” I wink at him when he laughs.

“I’ll make you pay for it later.”

“Mmmm, then I’ll have more, please.” And I take what’s left on his plate with a smile. Miko laughs next to me, but I can’t look at her without a blush forming.

After dinner, it’s poker playing time, and everyone files into the private room Maeda had set aside for us, but as we’re approaching the door, Yoichi lightly brushes my arm.

“Sit with me at the bar for a minute?”

Behind him, Jiro nods at me eagerly. It’s not really the time for apologies, but I’ve had a lot to drink, and I’m feeling sappy. I let Yoichi lead me away, and Jiro whispers to Sakai then sits on the opposite end of the bar.

Perching myself on a bar stool, I’m two meters tall, and with the Scotch and wine in me, I giggle as I try to not fall off. I’m a happy drunk.

“I don’t know where to start…”

“It’s okay. If I were you, I don’t think I’d be happy with me either. I’m sorry about Miko and all the upheaval in your family the past couple of months.”

“It’s not your fault,” he says, and I laugh. I swear he sounds exactly like Jiro.

“Yoichi, it’s sweet you and Jiro and everyone else want to make me feel better about my circumstances. It’s not something I planned or wanted to happen.” I reach over and take his hand. He’s a lot like Jiro, and holding his hand, I can see why he was a good sword fighter before he gave it up. “I come from a broken family. My aunts are my only saving grace. I grew up without a mother or father, removed from my culture, and shunned by my father’s side. I won’t say I had a sad childhood or anything — I was still pretty happy — but I didn’t have what you have, what Jiro has.”

It hurts physically, a punch in the stomach, to say these things out loud, to admit my family is damaged beyond repair. Thankfully the amount of alcohol I’ve consumed tonight is deadening the pain somewhat.

“Did you mean what you said, about Jiro marrying me against your wishes?” Yoichi closes his eyes and nods. Well, at least he’s honest. “I understand. Jiro does what he wants, and that’s another reason why I love him so much.”

“I’m sorry about what I said the other night. Really, really sorry,” Yoichi says, squeezing my hand.

He seems sincere, I think. I hope.

“Thanks. I understand how you feel. Please just know if other things happen, I don’t mean them to. I would never deliberately hurt any of you. I’d rather give up my life.”

I pick up my drink to sip, and the man who approached me earlier is eyeing me from across the bar, only a few people away. He’s serious before cocking a smile in my direction, playful and flirtatious. I wiggle my left hand with the drink at him, the diamonds on my ring finger catching the light. He shrugs his shoulders sadly and walks off to the blackjack tables. When I look down the bar past Yoichi, Jiro watches the man leave, his eyes cold and hard.

“Sanaa, despite my earlier misgivings, I’m glad you and my brother are together. I think you’re good for each other. I hope I didn’t ruin our relationship.”

“Help me down from here, please, before I fall off.” Once my feet are on the floor, I reach up and give him a kiss on the cheek. He’s a centimeter or two taller than Jiro, and even in these heels, I’m miniscule. “Our relationship is fine, but I’d like it to be better. Let’s spend more time together? I’m in the building all the time and would love to hang out.”

“I’d like that.”

We walk back to the poker room together with Jiro right behind us.

—-

The private poker room has two tables with two different dealers, and when I enter with Yoichi and Jiro, everyone is getting set up. I stand back in the shadows to assess things before anyone sees me.

Miko and Mariko are off to the side of the tables, talking low, their heads tilted towards one another. They both laugh and smile, Miko’s eyes shine happily, and Mariko reaches over to her hair and smooths out a piece that has flown away. Such a sweet, kind gesture, my chest constricts. Mariko touched me the one time when I came back from the desert months ago. Since then, I’ve been frozen out, never given even an ounce of this warmth. Before Miko leaves, Mariko kisses her on the cheek, and I have to look away. Look anywhere else, Sanaa.

Miko sees me, smiles, and comes straight to me. Smile, Sanaa. Put on the mask.

“Are you and Yoichi all right?” she asks, her hand stroking my shoulder before squeezing.

“We’re fine. Thanks.” I nod and continue smiling though I’m aware I’m not showing happiness in my eyes. They’re the hardest part of my body to trick. “You and Mariko are close.”

Shit. Why did I say anything? What is wrong with me? I’ve had too much to drink.

“Of course we are!” Miko says with a laugh while going through her purse. “She is my mother-in-law, after all.”

My feet won’t sit still even in these heels, and when Miko looks up, her smile is gone. Her eyebrows knit together, and I have to direct my eyes at my feet that are tapping away.

“But you’re close with Mariko too, right?”

Clearing my throat, I try to make light of this situation. “Not especially… not like that.” I wave my hand at where they were, and Miko’s head turns to the empty space she just came from.

“But your families were so close. I thought…” Miko is prompting me to agree with her, but I can’t lie about this when asked so directly. I can only shake my head.

“Sanaa…”

“Anyway, are you not playing poker?”

“Sanaa,” she says more forcefully.

I sigh and deflate, pulling her closer to me. “I think… I think she hates me, but I must be blowing things out of proportion.”

“Have you discussed this with Jiro?” Miko asks, her voice colored in shock.

I shake my head at her. “I mentioned this months ago, when I was still in the desert, and he told me I was crazy. Jiro and Beni both believe she loves me, so I must be reading her wrong.”

“I don’t know. You’re so good at reading people lately. Maybe she’s upset you never come out with us for the family dinners?”

“What? What family dinners?” I whip my head around to see if anyone is listening, and the room swims. The alcohol in my system is running my paranoia to extremes. Usagi starts across the room towards us.

“She said you were busy.” Miko grasps my upper arm, looking directly into my eyes.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I want to take this discussion to the ladies’ room, but Usagi is next to Miko with a smile.

“Shall I take you to the roulette table on my way out to play craps with Kentaro?”

Miko nods, Usagi leaves to get Kentaro, and I can do nothing but stand in shock. What’s going on in the family behind my back? I shake my head and steel my emotions that are threatening to churn with all the alcohol I’ve consumed tonight.

Miko, please change the subject. Fast.

“Won’t you come with me? You were having fun earlier.” Miko drops her betting card in her purse and snaps the clasp shut.

“I’d love to, but duty calls. Maeda will be back soon, and I have to be charming and flattering once more.”

“I didn’t know you could flirt like that. Jiro’s been ready to take you home all night. I’m surprised he let you leave Sakai building.”

Across the room, Jiro is talking to Oyama but watching us at the same time.

“I’m teasing him on purpose.”

“The sexual tension is palpable.” She fans herself with her hand for a moment before winking at me.

“Go have fun, Miko.”

“I wish you could have more fun,” she says, smiling sadly at me. “This all seems less than fair.”

“Those days are over, but I have to do something for entertainment, so I torture Jiro when I can. It’s the least I can do.” I shrug.

Miko smiles and nods her head. “We’ll talk about Mariko later. I promise,” she says, leaving the room with a wave of her hand. Then I kick myself as a waitress walks by and raises her eyebrows at me. I’ve said things to my friends tonight in public I would never say to strangers. That’s what I get for drinking and having a good time.

Business, Sanaa. My life is all business now.

New rule: if I’m not in my apartment, I don’t open up to anyone, even Jiro.

After watching everyone play poker for thirty minutes, Maeda checks in on us. I’m sure to stand next to him and talk about the dinner, the roulette tables, and how everyone makes fun of my lack of a poker face. I even lean forward to whisper in Jiro’s ear once or twice about non-sensical things so Maeda can get a better view of my legs. I’m shameless, really. I don’t even blush.

“Will you be playing before the night is through, Miss Itami?” Maeda asks as we walk to the door.

“Possibly. I’m going to get another Manhattan and see if that gives me an advantage.”

He lets out a large chuckle and reaches for my left hand. I fight every instinct I have that tells me to snatch it back and defend myself, but I do a good job of covering up the urge because Maeda doesn’t notice. He examines my ring, his smile straightens across his face, and his shoulders square up.

“Are you married to Jiro? Because something tells me you would not be that stupid to break the law before we leave for Yūsei.”

His grip on my hand tightens, and I put on my passive face and relax, doing everything I can to stop my heart from racing into a panic.

“We’re engaged and both wear the rings, but no, we’re not legally married. It is our way of saying I am… not for sale.”

“Off the market?”

I nod my head, he releases my hand, and I clasp both in front of me to keep them still. You’re in charge here, Sanaa. Not him.

“Sakai clan has come up in the world,” he says with a nod of his head.

I’m unsure whether to take this as a compliment or a threat. Does he think of Sakai clan as a competitor now instead of an ally? I decide to go with compliment.

“Yes, well, supposedly I’m quite the catch.” I let my eyes slide to the right. Jiro is two tables over watching us. Possessiveness makes his eyes sharp, and I slightly shake my head to tell him there’s nothing wrong. I can handle this.

“Indeed,” Maeda says, leaning in. “Something tells me once Miura and Taira clan are awake again, you will need your family and Sakai clan to keep you from becoming someone else’s catch.”

Ominous but most likely true. I’m sure now Maeda is not the one I have to worry about. He seems concerned for me, but the emotion quickly fades from his face. Maybe I was imagining it.

“Your bracelet has a koi charm on it. It was your mother’s, right?”

I nod. Perhaps he knew my mother better than I thought.

“Koi no takinobori, Miss Itami.” Maeda bows and leaves with no further comments.

I’ve heard this proverb before. It literally means ‘koi climbing waterfalls’ but is translated to mean ‘succeed vigorously in life.’ It would appear Maeda is giving me his best wishes. At least, I hope so. Who can tell for sure?

I sigh and go to Oyama to order another drink. I need one now after that exchange. Once he sets me up and starts playing, I stand back with Kentaro.

“Hmmm, Maeda seems interested in you.” He keeps his voice low and steps a little closer to me.

“Yeah. I get the feeling he’s not the only one I’ll have to say no to in my lifetime.”

Kentaro raises his eyebrows at me and smiles. Yes, I’ve already said no to Minamoto too concerning Kentaro. We each take a sip of our drinks and watch everyone play cards for a moment.

“Well, I like craps, and I’m crap at poker.” He gestures at the poker table with his glass in his hand.

“I thought you were out playing craps with Usagi?”

“I wanted to stick around and see how you dealt with Maeda. Playing with his baser instincts is something Jiro nor Sakai-san could do…” Kentaro leans his head forward, and I catch him looking down my dress. I cock my head and blink my eyes at him.

“See anything you like?” I whisper.

“No comment. I’m off.” And he turns to go before he blushes. I don’t think Kentaro hates me anymore though he will always be the same idiot boy he was in the beginning.

Looking at the clock on the terminal in the room, it’s after two, and everyone is still having a great time even Mariko. I want to go back out to the roulette table, but I can’t leave without having either Usagi or Jiro with me… or Sakai. Gods, I am beholden to other people for my own safety for the rest of my life.

I slowly walk around the outskirts of the room. Everyone is playing poker but me, Mariko, and Sakai. Mariko and Sakai are having a conversation so I won’t interrupt them. Sakai wouldn’t leave without Lucy anyway. Lucy and Beni are the biggest surprise players I’ve seen yet. They have stacks of chips in front of them higher than Oyama’s.

I’m ready to go home, and I know what I want, so I cross the room into Jiro’s eye-line.

Come on, Jiro. Look at me.

He looks up and sees me watching him. I raise my eyebrows at him and run my index finger from my neck straight down my front along the deep V-neck of my dress which ends just below the bottom of my breasts. Licking my bottom lip, I shrug my shoulders a little bit. Jiro swallows and stares. I smile and pick up my empty glass, lightly gesturing my head at the door.

“I’m cashing in,” he says pushing all of his chips away from him. “Sanaa looks tired.”

I set my drink down while faking a yawn, grab my card and purse, and Jiro and I say goodbye to everyone in the room. He leads me through the casino at a fast pace and outside he takes one look at me in my dress with the high heels and hails a taxi.

Back home, I kick off my shoes in the lobby, and we run up the stairs, past the security guard to our apartment. Once we’re inside, I tear at Jiro’s shirt and try to get it off of him as fast as I can without actually ripping the buttons off, but I don’t succeed. They pop off and skitter across the floor. He’s kissing me on my neck and down my front, and I throw my arms around his neck as my knees weaken.

I catch my breath as his hands travel up my legs and under my skirt, and he hesitates for a moment. “You aren’t wearing any underwear at all.”

“No.” I reach down and unbutton his pants. “I thought you knew.”

His hands keep going, and I think I may faint.

“If I knew, I doubt we would have made it out tonight.”

“Mmmm, I continue to surprise you.”