I'm going to be a little more personal on the blog today than I usually am, so if that's not your cup of tea, please scroll along. As many of you know the last few years have been a roller coaster for me. I considered quitting writing in 2021, got Covid and 8 months of brain fog in 2022, and then I found AI. I have been teaching AI to other authors since then, both as the main admin of a fairly large Facebook group devoted to it and as the CTO/VP of Future Fiction Academy. Besides that upheaval in my professional life, I also have had kids in high school and college, and then there was the failing of my dad's health and his passing. Plus, there's… *waves hand at the world*. I mean, if you've read my books, you probably have a good feeling about my politics, so we won't get into it. It's been a lot.
Now that I'm in my 50th year on this planet and I'm finally feeling settled with my professional life, I want to get back to my creativity. Yes, AI is a part of that, and I love that. AI has let me try new genres and create new things, for sure. But I had spent quite a few years away from my stories and my worlds, and I missed them. As I've been importing my books here to my website and reading through the notes I'm making on each chapter, I had been catching myself re-reading my old work… and enjoying them! I don't know why I'm so shocked by this. Lol. I have always said that I wrote my books, wrote these stories, because I wanted to read them. I wrote them FOR ME.
Yet the prevailing sentiment among authors is that we kinda hate our own work by the time we publish it, and once it's published we move onto the next book, and we don't look back. I honestly don't know why we do that. Perhaps it's because authors worry that they'll fall into the trap of revising something that's already published? As far as I can tell, no author I know re-reads their own work FOR PLEASURE. It's a completely foreign concept.
But I hear Becca Syme's voice in my head often (thanks, Becca!) and I questioned the premise. I was obviously enjoying my work when I wrote it, and again when I caught bits of the stories as I updated ebooks or published them here on the website. Why could I not just read the books for fun? Again, I wrote them FOR ME, and yet I never read them. That just seems wrong, like an opportunity wasted.
In December and January, I sat down and read The Nogiku Series, one book after another. I laughed at the jokes I had put in there. I cried. I binge-read until the wee hours of the night. And then I got really inspired to write a trilogy sequel. I hadn't been inspired to write in this world in a long time! My notes for that trilogy are really taking shape, and I'm excited to get started on it. Re-reading my own work is doing exactly what I thought it would. It's inspiring me. It's encouraging me to create again.
And that's not the end. I'm currently re-reading the Hikoboshi Series, and wow, the voice in this series is really strong. I had forgotten just how cutting Yumi was. I keep having moments of, “Did I really write this?” Kinda hard to believe! But again, this is inspiring me. It's making me think about the wider universe that I built between the different series, all those ships that left Earth in the Exodus and where are those people now. I'm watching Yumi and Rin connect and get to know each other, two disparate people from different worlds, and I'm loving the dynamic. I want to write that again.
I can write that again. I'm not quitting. I'm taking all the knowledge I have and I'm going to apply it to my universe and continue to create. This is why I'm here, on this Earth. I can feel it in my bones. I'm meant to create, to enjoy creating, and to share that with others. For me, it's not about profit. It's about sharing the stories with others.
Anyway, once I'm done getting all my books on my website (I'm close! Almost done!), that frees up more time to get writing done, and I'm excited about it finally. I'm grateful I have this large backlist of books I can re-read and enjoy.
Writing the books for myself was the right decision. I love them. I hope you enjoy them, too.
(Photo is of me recently reading and enjoying some GF cookies my daughter made over the long MLK weekend. Delicious!)
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